Sounds like the beginning of a great joke, right? Oh the possibilities! But it's no joke, folks....tonight at the restaurant/bar where I work, a deaf man and a blind woman came in for dinner. Keep this thought in mind as I say that I was in that "waa- waa- feeling sorry for myself "mood. I'm driving to my second job,and I'm pissed off at every dumbass driver that crossed my path. I am stressing over the beginning stages of musical planning....the business part of "show" business which I really don't like..I am also stressing over being in the midst of putting up a show which I "adopted" when their director quit....Plus..I am in a total "what the hell do I want to do if and when I grow up" phase.
Shut. Up. right?
So it's hot and it's humid, my hair looks like Linc from the Mod Squad and my mind is going in a hundred different directions and my first table is this deaf man and blind woman. GREAT! Within seconds ... I immediately start feeling like a real jackhole for even complaining about my perfect life. This couple sat there, holding hands... holding hands because that is how they communicate with each other. She would sign into his hand as he read the menu and signed back to her. He would look at me then and speak his order the best he could. I'm sure he was thinking why is this goofy woman smiling so much? (I suppose I smile a lot in awkward situations)...but it was better than trying to be all Annie Sullivan at them and try to"over" help. They were doing just fine on their own. They ordered their dinners and drank their sodas "with not a lot of ice" . They were fascinating to watch and absolutely adorable.
I wonder if they know the impact they had on me. It was like getting hit in the head with a cast iron frying pan a la Wile E. Coyote on the Road Runner cartoons. How dare I complain about the "stuff" I have to deal with. I think of the people I encounter during the day...co-workers, family, friends, random humans...there is a whole lot of bitching out there folks and I'm not so sure how much of it is justified. We all have "one of those days" ...I was having one myself. We are all allowed to have them ...once in a while. Some people, though, are really pushing it ...in my opinion. Now I am all about that "walking in their shoes"shit and you really don't know people until then...but COME ON!!! I see an awful lot of " boo hoo..there was a long line at the bank as I was cashing my $1000 check" kind of whining. I wish those people (and again- you know who you are) could have witnessed the deaf man and blind woman having dinner.
I wish more people had the LIVE LAUGH LOVE attitude that I try to have...and I think I do tons of reality checks when I start getting whiny. People need to do that more. And now here's a little story..
When I had my last child ...there were ....complications....not with her, thank God...with me. I won't go into it...that's a whole other blog topic. But I almost didn't make it. There were surgeries and heart issues and thoughts of being the main character in the Lifetime movie of the woman who went to have her third child and didn't come out alive....scary stuff kids...but it's been 22 years and for the most part have adopted the live your life lifestyle. You just never know ....
I have been accused, many ,many times of not taking things seriously., "you know, not everything is funny," I've been told... Well the truth is...not everything is funny...mostly it's hysterical ...you just have to be able to look at life a little differently. Sure there are serious, scary things...I 've been through a bunch of them...but when things are not that bad....don't make them worse. Try to be positive...have faith and don't be afraid to laugh and enjoy the ride.
Back to the deaf man and the blind woman...they ate every bit of their dinner....paid their bill, left me a great tip and they were on their way. The bartender and I wondered how they manage. What do they do when they get home. How do they run errands, pay bills and just do every day tasks ?Everything seemed like it was such a struggle....probably not to them, though..they were just out for dinner on a lovely, warm May evening. I honestly can not get them out of my mind..but I forgot to mention that when I gave them their drinks, they sat there for a minute. As I walked away.. out of the corner of my eye I saw them clink glasses together...."cheers".
Now I don't like to cry in public....I am a very emotional person but I do NOT like people to see me cry....only a few chosen have...but man...turn on the water works when I saw the deaf man and the blind woman toast each other over their diet pepsi's....it was truly one of the coolest thing I ever saw. I'm not going to say it changed my life but it surely gave me a kick in the big ass attitude adjustment.... So maybe I didn't get that interview and ONE of our cars may need work on the transmission...and my kitchen counter didn't come in ..but just I saw and I heard two of the coolest people ever who made me open my eyes and ears on this lovely, warm May evening ...."cheers'.....just saying
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Sunday, May 6, 2012
This is a test...this is only a test.....
Beeeeeeep....remember those? Those Emergency Broadcast System things used to scare the shit out of me! What were those and what is the Emergency Broadcast System anyway? All I know is that I would hear that beep and think "just a test...did they say it was just a test? This isn't THE emergency where we are supposed to tune into that station....wait ...what are we supposed to do....WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO?"
I can only assume that this stress early on in my life contributed to my hatred for tests! I hate tests -always have. I guess I don't know of too many people who enjoy them (I'm sure you're out there) but I know there are people who handle them better than I.
I am not a good test taker....I never was. I would try to study but I never knew what to study and I always studied the wrong stuff. I had all kinds of tricks, songs, mnemonic and none of that information was ever on the test. I would read so much in to the questions that I would wind up stressing over the simplest things.
(What do they mean by Name__________________?)
Tests- I know at one point in my life....way, way back... I took a test and did so well that they wanted me to skip a grade at School 49. I think it was 1st or 2nd - I don't know because my Mom said no based on the fact that I was too little....size wise...too little. I will pause here for the collective ...huh?. Whatever ...I can't think about how different things may have been because everything happens for a reason but seriously....too little....huh?
But grade skipping aside, I know that I am sort of bright, kind of clever and sometimes I can be
somewhat of a "smartypants" if you will...but put a test in front of me and I'm all TRUE...no FALSE...no TRUE...oh shit! Maybe I can make it look like a "T" and an "F" and let the person correcting deal with it.
Tests- I'm stressed just thinking about the word. Even out of the school setting...who ever wants to hear the phrase "I'm sending you for tests" or "those tests were inconclusive so we'll run some more tests " I do not like those kinds of tests either.
Road Test- I passed mine on the first try and I am a HORRIBLE driver. I checked my mirrors and parallel parked and passed....so what did that prove. It proved for that little snapshot of my driving ventures, I did everything right. I guess that is kind of my point. Tests kind of show what you know or what you remember at that little snippet of time. In college, I took and passed tests in classes ranging from Greek Mythology to Geology to Rhetoric...test me now on that BS ( ironically the degree I earned) I don't think I would do very well...geology-really?. I do know a bit about Greek Mythology mostly thanks to crossword puzzles and Jeopardy.
The reason TESTS have jumped in the forefront of my cluttered brain is that for the past two week the 3rd, 4th & 5th graders at the school I work at have been inundated with New York State tests. Now the tests have been all over the news mostly due to the unfair questions, the "opting out" movement, the amount of time used for teaching to the tests and the ridiculous actions they will be taking with the results of these tests.
A certain percentage of the classroom teacher's evaluation will be determined by the outcome of the tests. Can you imagine you are assessed based on how a bunch of 8 year olds felt like doing on a test on a certain day?
It's like my driving test. I did well on that day....but if I hadn't, I wouldn't have gotten my licence...but they wouldn't have taken away my dad's licence because he's the one who taught me how to drive. Sounds silly when you think about it like that. But that isn't even the worst part. I just think about that one kid...that one who is just like me when I'm faced with tests. The stress of having to take 6 tests in 2 weeks is more than I would have been able to handle at that age.
They are told not to worry and get upset about it, it's just like any other test but only use these #2 pencils (do we know what the other number pencils are for)/we can't answer any of your question/ if you need to use the bathroom you must do so with a chaperone /and make sure you bubble in correctly/ DON'T ERASE -cross out then circle...what the fuck? I'm stressed!
Let's face it ... I took tests as a kid and I know, more recently my kids took tests. I always told them do your best, prepare yourself and do your best...YOUR best. You don't have to do THE best. If you do, great, but just try to show what you are capable of.
I recall my youngest (a lot like me) totally stressing about these test. Stomach aches ...head aches...and me totally relaxed mom at this point... telling her that the outcome of these tests for her will be someone saying..."oh she did well, just like I thought or hmmm I thought she'd do better". But either way it won't change your day to day life....and it didn't. My son...who also followed in my footsteps as a bad test taker...did not fare well on his Math assessment way back when he was 12 or 13. (yes ...let's test kids going through puberty and base important decisions on those results.) When the dust settled and the results were in, his score showed he was eligible for extra help in Math,
a subject that he was now pulling 90's in. So much for tests, I did have one good test taker- my oldest daughter--the logical one ...She has a brilliant mathematical mind and also says some of the "air headiest "things I ever heard uttered by a human being. So much for tests.
So in conclusion..being an intelligent woman, a "smartypants" as aforementioned, I can see the need for tests- I understand what they show ....but I don't think it tells the whole story. While proctoring one of these test I encountered a "little darling" that will probably score very well on these assessments but was one of the most obnoxious, rudest child I've seen. What are you going to do with that New York State! While tests are important ...I always feel there are things that can't be tested (on paper) that prove more important. I like seeing people's true colors come out when "tested" in certain situations. Some of the "smartest" people are the "dumbest" people I know. You know who you are!
So tests...are there good tests? Taste tests- I guess I'd like those...Pregnancy tests...I was always pretty good at those-- ( I can pee on those sticks like nobody's business) but those can be scary too...
And the phrase "I've been tested" has a whole new meaning in these current times One's reaction to hearing that phrase come out of one of your childrens' mouths is a true test of a person ----my reaction.....let me see if I can illustrate it....you know those Looney Tune cartoons where the character has a frozen smile on and piece by piece their face falls apart....yeah that's the reaction!
So yeah I get it ...tests are a necessary evil in all aspects of society but I guess how you react and what you do with the results is more telling than anything they can test you on.
Just
a) be prepared
b) do your best
c) don't panic
d) whatever the result- deal with it and move on
Ummm...I choose e) all of the above...true? no... false no true...can you repeat the question...
just sayin'
I can only assume that this stress early on in my life contributed to my hatred for tests! I hate tests -always have. I guess I don't know of too many people who enjoy them (I'm sure you're out there) but I know there are people who handle them better than I.
I am not a good test taker....I never was. I would try to study but I never knew what to study and I always studied the wrong stuff. I had all kinds of tricks, songs, mnemonic and none of that information was ever on the test. I would read so much in to the questions that I would wind up stressing over the simplest things.
(What do they mean by Name__________________?)
Tests- I know at one point in my life....way, way back... I took a test and did so well that they wanted me to skip a grade at School 49. I think it was 1st or 2nd - I don't know because my Mom said no based on the fact that I was too little....size wise...too little. I will pause here for the collective ...huh?. Whatever ...I can't think about how different things may have been because everything happens for a reason but seriously....too little....huh?
But grade skipping aside, I know that I am sort of bright, kind of clever and sometimes I can be
somewhat of a "smartypants" if you will...but put a test in front of me and I'm all TRUE...no FALSE...no TRUE...oh shit! Maybe I can make it look like a "T" and an "F" and let the person correcting deal with it.
Tests- I'm stressed just thinking about the word. Even out of the school setting...who ever wants to hear the phrase "I'm sending you for tests" or "those tests were inconclusive so we'll run some more tests " I do not like those kinds of tests either.
Road Test- I passed mine on the first try and I am a HORRIBLE driver. I checked my mirrors and parallel parked and passed....so what did that prove. It proved for that little snapshot of my driving ventures, I did everything right. I guess that is kind of my point. Tests kind of show what you know or what you remember at that little snippet of time. In college, I took and passed tests in classes ranging from Greek Mythology to Geology to Rhetoric...test me now on that BS ( ironically the degree I earned) I don't think I would do very well...geology-really?. I do know a bit about Greek Mythology mostly thanks to crossword puzzles and Jeopardy.
The reason TESTS have jumped in the forefront of my cluttered brain is that for the past two week the 3rd, 4th & 5th graders at the school I work at have been inundated with New York State tests. Now the tests have been all over the news mostly due to the unfair questions, the "opting out" movement, the amount of time used for teaching to the tests and the ridiculous actions they will be taking with the results of these tests.
A certain percentage of the classroom teacher's evaluation will be determined by the outcome of the tests. Can you imagine you are assessed based on how a bunch of 8 year olds felt like doing on a test on a certain day?
It's like my driving test. I did well on that day....but if I hadn't, I wouldn't have gotten my licence...but they wouldn't have taken away my dad's licence because he's the one who taught me how to drive. Sounds silly when you think about it like that. But that isn't even the worst part. I just think about that one kid...that one who is just like me when I'm faced with tests. The stress of having to take 6 tests in 2 weeks is more than I would have been able to handle at that age.
They are told not to worry and get upset about it, it's just like any other test but only use these #2 pencils (do we know what the other number pencils are for)/we can't answer any of your question/ if you need to use the bathroom you must do so with a chaperone /and make sure you bubble in correctly/ DON'T ERASE -cross out then circle...what the fuck? I'm stressed!
Let's face it ... I took tests as a kid and I know, more recently my kids took tests. I always told them do your best, prepare yourself and do your best...YOUR best. You don't have to do THE best. If you do, great, but just try to show what you are capable of.
I recall my youngest (a lot like me) totally stressing about these test. Stomach aches ...head aches...and me totally relaxed mom at this point... telling her that the outcome of these tests for her will be someone saying..."oh she did well, just like I thought or hmmm I thought she'd do better". But either way it won't change your day to day life....and it didn't. My son...who also followed in my footsteps as a bad test taker...did not fare well on his Math assessment way back when he was 12 or 13. (yes ...let's test kids going through puberty and base important decisions on those results.) When the dust settled and the results were in, his score showed he was eligible for extra help in Math,
a subject that he was now pulling 90's in. So much for tests, I did have one good test taker- my oldest daughter--the logical one ...She has a brilliant mathematical mind and also says some of the "air headiest "things I ever heard uttered by a human being. So much for tests.
So in conclusion..being an intelligent woman, a "smartypants" as aforementioned, I can see the need for tests- I understand what they show ....but I don't think it tells the whole story. While proctoring one of these test I encountered a "little darling" that will probably score very well on these assessments but was one of the most obnoxious, rudest child I've seen. What are you going to do with that New York State! While tests are important ...I always feel there are things that can't be tested (on paper) that prove more important. I like seeing people's true colors come out when "tested" in certain situations. Some of the "smartest" people are the "dumbest" people I know. You know who you are!
So tests...are there good tests? Taste tests- I guess I'd like those...Pregnancy tests...I was always pretty good at those-- ( I can pee on those sticks like nobody's business) but those can be scary too...
And the phrase "I've been tested" has a whole new meaning in these current times One's reaction to hearing that phrase come out of one of your childrens' mouths is a true test of a person ----my reaction.....let me see if I can illustrate it....you know those Looney Tune cartoons where the character has a frozen smile on and piece by piece their face falls apart....yeah that's the reaction!
So yeah I get it ...tests are a necessary evil in all aspects of society but I guess how you react and what you do with the results is more telling than anything they can test you on.
Just
a) be prepared
b) do your best
c) don't panic
d) whatever the result- deal with it and move on
Ummm...I choose e) all of the above...true? no... false no true...can you repeat the question...
just sayin'
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