"This is not my life" is a phrase that has running through my mind lately. I know all the kids these days are saying F***My Life ...and with my love of the F-word, you would think FML would be my phrase of choice. But it isn't. I suppose it is because I'm not angry or fed up with my life...I am merely an observer on how bizarre-o life (mine or anyones) can be at any given moment. Sometimes these moments are cool, sometimes crazy.
I think a lot of the events of my life are inherent and inevitable. The schizophrenia nature of my life comes from the fact that my dad, the cool Bohemian artist who would listen to Bob Dylan at 2 AM and my crazy "what are people going to think" mom had profound influences on me.
So here I am finding myself in situations both cool and crazy.
For example a couple weekends ago, before the devastation of the hurricane, my daughters and I went to NYC. It was a perfect weekend. We hopped on a plane and flew down to visit friends and family. I don't fly a lot of places...I really don't really enjoy flying. But when I do, I always feel kind of cool....but on the inside I'm crazy. But this time, one of my daughters cornered the market on crazy. She isn't a good flyer is an understatement. Although there was no vomit....there was a 55 minute threat of it. I, being the good mother, pushed down my crazy to keep her cool. "oh that was nothing...just an air pocket or something" ...when really I'm thinking "mayday mayday ...were going doooowwwnnnn..." COOL and CRAZY ....PS.. the flight home was brought to you by VODKA MARTINIS.
So we land, grabbed a cab, devoured a couple Magnolia cupcakes and met my very good friend at 30 Rock . COOL. Later, that afternoon, we got our photos taken and showed ID's to have clearance to go backstage and watch a rehearsal of Saturday Night Live...whaaaaaaaaaaaaat ??? SO COOL!
Here I am looking at the stage where performers I've adored stood on. A stage that I would dream about being on ( c'mon, who hasn't) since the 70's. I'm standing in the hallway looking at a wa;; of pictures of all the hosts and musical guests when I hear a familiar voice. Oh it's just Tom Hanks...Tom Freaking Hanks.. COOLEST EVER....I'll say it : '''This is not my life"
So let's look at the flip side...a couple weeks prior to my SNL coolness I picked up my Dad (who is in the middle of recovering from knee surgery) to go to the store. He had to go to the store so he could return a box of oatmeal that he didn't want. Yup... oatmeal. I, of course offered to do it which meant handing him the $3.79 and tossing the box in the trash. But no, he had to tell the "couldn't care less"customer service person himself that the oatmeal tasted funny...of course it did ....IT'S OATMEAL!!!! CRAZY I'll say it: "This is not my life"
Sometime these crazy cool events are directly related which makes me think I probably bring all this on myself.
About a month ago I adopted 2 kittens from a rescue organization ...COOL. I was talked into taking 2 kittens, which didn't take much talking into I must admit. They are brothers and adorable and when I decided to take both kittens there was actually a round of applause from everyone because I wasn't separating them...VERY COOL. A few days ago I noticed that one of the kittens came down with a little cold. The lady from the organization offered to bring me some meds for him. So she asked if I would meet her in a convenient parking lot to make the pick up. A situation I like to call Breaking Sad.... on a beautiful sunny day for what seemed like forever I waited. What is everyone else doing today...I am spending my afternoon waiting for cat drugs CA-RAZY..Let's all say it: "This is not my life."
The more I talk to people, the more I realize that we all find ourselves in situations that are both crazy/cool. It just depends how you look at things. Almost immediately after commenting on how tired I was from our whirlwind weekend in the city and I have to start taking it easy, I found myself in Rochester ...on a school night no less to see Bruce Springsteen for the 14th time. Half my friends thought COOL...the others...CRAZY. As much as I sometimes hate to admit it, schizophrenic or not... this IS my life. I think the crazier it gets. the cooler it actually is. So here I sit blogging away...one little kitten sitting on my lap so cool while the other is tangled up in the power cord of my laptop...so crazy ....Coincidence, I think not....just sayin'